The 007 Re-Read Project: Role of Honour by John Gardner

It's been quite a while since my last foray into the post-Fleming Bond continuation novels, but 26 short months later, I'm back at it! Role of Honour is John Gardner's fourth James Bond novel, originally published in 1984. I remembered virtually nothing about this novel nearly three decades after I read it, apart from a couple of character names. As ever, I won't blow the entire plot, but there are

SPOILERS AHEAD!

 

After receiving a sizeable inheritance,  James Bond has some unfavorable attention directed toward him, even within the Secret Service. M sees this as an opportunity to crack a rather tough case, orchestrating a phony falling out between Bond and MI6. This receives some publicity, even leading to a newspaper interview with Bond over the matter! Even with Bond's history with many of them, other organizations are unable to resist trying to recruit him. The one he is interested in is led by computer whiz Dr. Jay Autem Holy, who has faked his death, and is now masquerading as Jason St. John Finnes. He and his compatriots are up to something sinister in a small English village, and it is vital that Bond infiltrate his organization and discover exactly what. Holy's own widow, Percy Proud, herself a CIA agent, meets with Bond in Monaco to teach him everything he needs to know about computer programming to carry out his mission. Bond is successful in being recruited, but it turns out that Holy is working for another organization, one with a long, bloody history with Bond. 

 Remember up above where I said I remembered virtually nothing about this novel prior to re-reading it? That's because it's dreadfully dull. It seems to take forever for anything to actually happen, and when it does, none of it is particularly interesting. There are certainly some interesting concepts here, such as Holy creating elaborate computer programs to train operatives to commit crimes with clockwork precision. The idea of Bond splitting from the service and being sought out by other organizations is also a promising setup, but Gardner fails to make any of it particularly engaging. It is quaintly amusing to read about the miracles of the computer age, things that were absolute cutting edge, or simply not yet possible, at the time. 

Bond himself acts out of character at times. A scene where he sings aloud while driving comes off as particularly odd. Gardner takes great pains to construct a decent backstory and skillset for Holy, but the man remains bland and nonthreatening. Percy Proud is fine as the female lead, but is again a pretty unmemorable character. That Gardner goes so far as having Bond consider marrying her is laughable, given their complete lack of chemistry. There's simply nothing compelling about the character as written, certainly nothing of the spark that Tracy Draco possessed. Perhaps the most egregious sin committed is handing over leadership of one of the great Bond villain organizations to Tamil Rahani, a character introduced about halfway through the novel, who is as dull as they come. He is very much a stock terrorist character with nothing notable about him. I remember him returning as the main antagonist in the next novel, so hopefully he fares better there!

 

Notable quotes:

(On the downfall of Monaco) Even those had not created a safe buffer against some of the more garish encroachments of the 1980s. On his last visit, Bond had been horrified to find one-armed bandits installed in the exclusive Salles Privees of the Casino.  Now he would not be surprised if there were space invader games there as well. 

 ________________________________

 Bond reflected on his own past encounters with the kind of madness that turned men into devils. 

 _________________________________

Conspirators can rarely divorce without one partner seriously damaging the other.

 __________________________________

 Always, in Switzerland, Bond thought, you knew you were in a small, rich country, for all the buildings looked as though they had been assembled in some sterile room from a plastic kit, complete with small details of greenery and flowers.

 ___________________________________

 

 Unlike the previous two Gardner Bonds, which I enjoyed despite their flaws, this one simply has too many issues for me to recommend it. For an author as skilled as Gardner, I'm honestly astonished at how deficient this one is. It's not a good Bond novel, and neither is it good as a generic thriller. It's a misfire in nearly every aspect. Hopefully Gardner returns to form with the next entry. Nobody Lives Forever is up next, and I promise it won't take me more than two years to get to it! See you then. 

Rant Review: The Drippy Trip 1,000 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Magic Puzzle Company, art by Ghostshrimp)

This is my second puzzle from Magic Puzzle Company, following my completion last year of The Mystic Maze. As much as I enjoyed that one, I really don't know why it took me so long to do another. I found TMM to be entirely worthy of its hype, and this puzzle continues that trend. The art is vibrant and charming, with something interesting to look at no matter what section you're working on. Some of my favorite bits are (of course) the sea turtles, the pirate queens of various species, the aliens chilling in the hammocks, the candy and ice cream-loving dinosaurs, the frog with the headphones, and the fast food items that are jammin' to the boom box. My favorite section is the lower left, and it's the one I completed first. I don't like its color scheme the most, but I enjoyed spotting all the sea creatures and vehicles. 

Once the main part of the puzzle was completed, of course, I still wasn't done. I rearranged the free-floating sections, and the secret envelope yielded about another 100 pieces. There is no reference image for this section, so this represents the biggest challenge for chronic box-peekers like me. Still, it's a small enough area that it went together easily enough. The various items scattered around the room include some fun Easter eggs, such as the MOTU-style insect man and the TMNT figure. (These go well with the off-brand Spongebob floating near the bottom of the puzzle.)

The quality remains superb, with thick, sturdy pieces, and a near total absence of puzzle dust. The feel and texture of the pieces make them my favorite to handle, even more so than those of the Trefl Prime I completed last week. My sole gripe is, once again, the loose fit. It just makes no sense to have loose-fitting pieces on a puzzle whose entire gimmick hinges on moving sections around. Two reference posters are included, and all of the envelopes are reusable. I really appreciate MPC's lack of waste! I have eight more of these, so don't be surprised to see another one soon. I don't plan to wait seven months this time!

 

Rant Review: No Pain, No Painting 500 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Trefl Prime, Art by Anna Rupprecht)

Trefl is a new-to-me brand, so I couldn't resist picking up several of their puzzles during that ridiculously awesome sale a week or so back. I made sure one of my purchases was from Trefl's Prime lineup. Trefl promises "the finest puzzle experience" right on the box, and all the commentary I've heard backs that up, so I was expecting top-tier quality. Did this puzzle live up to my expectations? Read on to find out! (Or just skip to the end now; I'm not your boss!)

I chose this puzzle from the small selection of TP puzzles in the sale because I like the art style and vibrant colors, and it looked like the most enjoyable one to do. It was fun, and quite easy, with clearly defined sections. The few overlapping colors didn't complicate things much. The snake winding around the puzzle links the separate scenes together while providing the puzzle's most challenging bits. (Still quite easy, however; I left most of the snake for last, and by that time, I had so few pieces remaining that it took all of five minutes to finish it.) Quick and easy, and quite fun to do, this puzzle is a total hit from an art standpoint.

The texture of the box impressed me as soon as I unpacked it. It's very sturdy, and has a nice matte texture, appropriate for the higher quality that is part of the TP line's appeal. I was hoping that the actual pieces would feel as nice. Inside the world's noisiest plastic bag (I was a little surprised that a resealable bag wasn't used) were pieces with a texture that completely surpassed my expectations. Thick, matte, and with the soft velvety feel promised on the box, these are quite possibly the best feeling puzzle pieces I've ever held. The only brand I've done with piece feel on par with this is Magic Puzzle Company, though those are slightly marred by a loose fit. These pieces fit together snugly enough that I could lift sections and move them into place with no worries that they would crumble. This was particularly nice after the crumbly Cardinal I did a few days ago! A decent-sized poster is included.

Unfortunately, it wasn't all sunshine and roses. There were several chunks of pieces that had not been fully cut, and I had more than a dozen damaged pieces. Some were pretty damn bad. This is easily the worst, and most prolific, damage I've ever had in a new puzzle. (Worse than nearly all of the second-hand puzzles I've had, too!) It's definitely an odd feeling experiencing both the best and worst quality in the same puzzle! I can only assume that Trefl had some Covid-era production issues, as many manufacturers did. In the end, I paid $8 for this puzzle, and for that price, its good points vastly outweighed the QC issues. This won't stop me from getting more TP puzzles in the future, and I'll definitely get to one of my standard Trefls soon! 

Rant Review: Slice of Life 1,000 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Cardinal, Art by Royce McClure)

I've been interested in Educa's Life puzzle for years now, but the chances of me doing a 24,000 piece puzzle were approximately-- hang on, let me get my calculator and do the math here... hm, yes, approximately ZERO. When I found out that a 1,000 piece puzzle featuring a small chunk of the art existed, it was inevitable that I would get it. From what I found online, it's been released by both Cardinal and Milton Bradley. I ordered the Cardinal version because I found it first, and the price was cheaper than I expected. Maybe I should have taken that as a warning.

But we'll get to that in a minute. First, the art is vibrant and colorful, every bit as much as the larger version. Compressed to this much smaller size, it is absolutely packed with detail. The underwater section was my favorite, not only because I always enjoy underwater scenes, but because it has the most visual interest. I put this together from the bottom up, beginning with the coral reef and finishing with the space-bound doves and planets. I really enjoyed this puzzle, and it has whetted my appetite for the related one that arrived the day I started on it. But, I'm getting ahead of myself again!

I would have enjoyed it even more if the pieces were of better quality. Cardinal was an unfamiliar brand to me, and I wasn't sure what to expect. I actually quite like the feel of the pieces, but they're very thin, and the fit is quite loose. False fits were possible pretty much everywhere, though the amount of detail in the art made them pretty easy to avoid in most areas. The loose fit makes this one of the most crumbly puzzles I've ever done, and moving even two or three pieces without them separating was simply not possible. More than once, my hand lightly brushed against the puzzle, something which normally has no effect. In this case, it resulted in a bunch of pieces breaking apart and having to be reassembled. The included poster is comically small, and pretty much useless. The puzzle is easy enough that it was unnecessary, fortunately. On the positive side, there was virtually no dust. This level of quality is fine for a cheap puzzle, but I may grab the MB version at some point to see how it compares. I've done a couple of MBs before, and while the quality was not top-tier, it was better than this. Plus, it'll give me an excuse to do the puzzle again!

Rant Review: Puzzle Moment: Sydney 99 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Ravensburger, Art by Katinka Reinke)

This is another of the small Puzzle Moment puzzles I ordered last year. Quick and easy, with nice, colorful art. I really like the idea of these cheap little puzzle cubes; this is the sort of thing I'd like to see in the impulse buy section at checkout counters.

 

Rant Review: Doughnuts & Coffee 1,000 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (White Mountain, Art by Lars Stewart)

My niece wanted to choose my next puzzle, and selected a donut-themed one from my garage sale haul from a couple of weeks back. I had to decline doing it since it's a 2,000 piecer, and I currently don't have the space for one so large. I remembered that I had this one from an old Goodwill haul sitting in a cabinet, and she accepted it as a substitute. While not difficult, it was more challenging than I expected. There are many different colors and textures, but several are repeated in multiple areas, and some are very similar to one another. I got the edges done very quickly, then took far too long to do maybe 10% of the puzzle. It required far more sorting than I normally feel like doing, which resulted in me putting off returning to it for a few days. Once I finally sucked it up and did a much more thorough sort, I quickly finished the remaining 90%. I've done deeper sorting with other puzzles when it was necessary, but I just WAS NOT feeling it this past week!

I've found White Mountain to be a reliable brand with above average quality, and this was no exception. There were a couple of slightly bent pegs, but I chalk that up to it being put together previously. The pieces were clean, there no odors or hair, and no pieces were missing. For a cheap used puzzle, I call that a win!

Rant Review: Masters of the Universe: Free for All 100 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Golden, Art by Fred Carillo, 1985)

This is the last of my vintage MOTU puzzles, for now, at least. In another Fred Carillo-illustrated scene, we have a battle between He-Man and Faker, while Man-at-Arms takes on Whiplash. I have no idea why Whiplash's head looks like a deformed aardvark. Skeletor lingers in the back and blasts a large stalactite to make it fall on his hated foe, as befits the dirtiest player in the game. Meanwhile, Mer-Man helps by chilling in a pool of water and watching with obvious glee. I assume he's delighted at the prospect of stabbing and/or pulling under anyone who slips and falls into the water, but you never know with that guy! Really, zoom in and look at his face. He is bursting with joy at watching these muscled-up weirdos beat the hell out of each other! I reckon Mer-Man lives by the adage, "Do what you love, and you'll never work a day in your life!" Carillo not drawing any teeth in the lower half of his mouth gives him this dopey look that cracks me up every time I look at him. 

He-Man is again depicted in his Battle Armor, while Skeletor is still in his standard gear, just like in my last vintage MOTU puzzle. The Battle Armor figures were being pushed hard at the time, largely supplanting the standard versions in most package art and merchandise, so it's interesting that Skeletor was consistently not wearing his in these puzzles. 

Faker was a pretty mysterious character who rarely appeared in any media, so it's cool to see him here. I don't remember ever seeing him in any store, and none of my friends had him. Mine came from a garage sale, and had some flecks of silver paint along one side where someone had apparently been using spray paint or an airbrush near him at some point. I pretended it was battle damage, and it made the toy cooler to me. A robot being as strong as He-Man made no sense to me-- if Skeletor could build a robot that strong, why wouldn't he make a bunch of them and take over Castle Grayskull that way?-- so I reasoned that there had to be something unique about Faker. I enacted a scenario with my toys where Tri-Klops wounded He-Man in battle, returning to Snake Mountain with the hero's blood on his blade. Skeletor removed the blood and performed some arcane ritual to bond it to his Faker, infusing the mechanical menace with some of He-Man's power. This made him a serious threat, worthy of his package art, in which He-Man was forced to wait to ambush his evil doppleganger as he relentlessly hunted him. (Cardback scan via the always awesome Battle Ram Blog!)

The puzzle quality is the same as the last one, as expected for an old cheap puzzle like this. The pieces are thin and have a rather loose fit, with a few split pegs here and there. No missing piece this time, though, so that's a plus! The original owner affixed a swanky Ellery Queen subscription sticker to the bottom of the box, a nice bit of bonus nostalgia. I'll hopefully snag more of these soon, but it's tough to find any at a decent price that aren't absolutely trashed, so we'll just have to wait and see!

Rant Review: Be Wary the Silent Night 500 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Cobble Hill, Art by Andy Kehoe)

The moment I saw this puzzle, I had two thoughts: 

1. I love that art! Must have it. 

2. All those damn TREES!!!

That pretty much sums this puzzle up. Love the art, but all those trees made much of it hell to put together. The edges, sky, and snow with Temu Batman walking in front of the forest flew together within minutes. The back row of purple-tinted trees went together very quickly, the next row of dark blue ones noticeably less so, and then followed a days-long slog of trying nearly every single piece in every spot to find the one that fit properly. The slightly larger pieces didn't help much, as that only meant that I had bigger blobs of indistinct black and blue-tinted white on each piece. I knew what I was getting into when I bought the thing, and it's far from the toughest puzzle I've done, but it was definitely worse than I expected. I can't imagine doing a 1,000 piece version of it! Still, for all of that, the end result is worth it. I love its creepy wintery vibe. It's definitely frame-worthy. 

This was my first Cobble Hill puzzle, and I was pretty pleased with its quality. Pieces are sturdy, with a low-gloss finish and texture similar to Ravensburger. There wasn't much dust, so no pre-sort sifting was required, which was nice. I like the cut, and pieces fit together well. False fits sometimes occurred, but always felt just ever so slightly off, and a close inspection would reveal that the indistinct blobs didn't quite line up. So, the handful of false fits I encountered were easily caught. A reference poster is included, printed on nice textured paper. I didn't use it, but it's always nice to have the option. I have three more Cobble Hills, bought during the same sale, so I'll look forward to tackling another one soon.  

Rant Review: Ocean Lounge 1,000 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Ravensburger, Art by Dean MacAdam)

This one was pure fun all the way through! Love the setting, the art style, and vibrant colors. There's something interesting to look at no matter what part of the puzzle you're working on. The shark couple placed front and center draw the eye, but my favorite background critters are the sax playing crab, the blind fish using a cane to swim, the clownfish, the dolled-up dolphin, the jellyfish, and the blinged-out grouper. The skeleton in the diving suit adds a nice bit of creepiness, and I'm a little confused why the lady shark has boobs. 

I did one of MacAdam's puzzles last year, and liked it enough that I've picked up a few others on sale here and there. Like Jazzy, this is from my Black Friday order direct from Ravensburger. It was used at nationals last year, where I suspect it was completed rather more quickly than I did it. The typical Ravensburger quality is present, with all that entails. The masses of blue dust I sifted from the pieces helped set the ocean theme, I reckon.

Rant Review: Masters of the Universe: Attack by Sea and Air 200 (minus 1!) Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Golden, Art by Fred Carillo, 1985)

Another vintage MOTU puzzle, this one 200-- nope, make that 199 pieces. I judged the missing piece worth it since I got the puzzle dirt cheap. This action scene shows He-Man sideswiping Mer-Man with the Wind Raider while Skeletor, having apparently stormed Point Dread and stolen the Talon Fighter, prepares to take out his bitter enemy as Buzz-Off tries to intervene. Interestingly, He-Man is depicted in his battle armor, while Skeletor remains in his standard garb. Mer-Man is depicted as he appeared in cross-sell art, rather than the actual toy. It was fairly unusual to see this version of him as late as 1985, but it fits with artist Fred Carillo's rendering of the character. Carillo illustrated storybooks and other licensed items for the vintage MOTU line. He also added a dorsal fin to Mer-Man, as seen in this illustration from the Golden storybook The Sword of Skeletor. This was a nice bit of artistic license I appreciated, and it led me to always draw Mer-Man with that fin when I was little. His facial expression here just kills me; he's basically just been run over, and he's like, "Oh well, that's life!"

Like the last of these vintage MOTU puzzles I did, the pieces are thin, and some have a bit of slight warping. This particular puzzle has several pieces with pegs that are splitting apart. I like that the box still has the K-Mart price sticker on it! I should note that the puzzle is untitled, so I made one up that fits with the other titles in the series. 

 

Jazzy! 500 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Ravensburger, Art by Greg Paprocki)

This one instantly went on my wishlist when I saw it last year, and I finally ordered it when Ravensburger had their Black Friday sale. It's been chilling in my "to do" stacks until this afternoon. I love the bold colors and retro art style! It was a quick and fun completion, one I can easily see myself putting together again at some point when the mood strikes me. The pieces are typical Ravensburger quality, with their thick pieces that fit well together, slightly loose fit, and several pounds of dust. 

Rant Review: Masters of the Universe: Surprise Attack 63 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle (Golden, Art by R.A. Allen, 1983)

Hot off the USPS delivery truck comes this vintage MOTU puzzle from 1983! I'm not sure whether or not this is one I had when I was little; I know the art from my childhood, but I also had this coloring book that used the same art on its cover, so my memories may be from that. The artist is not credited on the box, but I recognize it as the work of R.A. Allen. Allen contributed painted art to a fair few licensed MOTU items, and much of it wound up on puzzles. His painted art is overshadowed by the work of artists such as William George, Earl Norem, and Rudy Obrero, but he contributed solid work that I feel is rather underappreciated by MOTU fandom at large. 

This art has its roots in MOTU as it existed prior to the Filmation cartoon, an era many of us hold near and dear. Signs of this are Teela with blonde hair and wielding her serpent staff, and Skeletor using the power sword, while He-Man is armed only with his axe. These were common elements in MOTU stories before DC Comics and Filmation revamped the lore into what is recognizable to most people to this day. (I'll just add that while I preferred the pre-cartoon version of MOTU, I was always vaguely annoyed by blonde Teela. I preferred her as a redhead!)

The puzzle pieces are thin, and some have a bit of very mild warping. They fit together very loosely, without much interlocking going on.  The pieces are large and easy for small hands to work into place. I have a couple more of these vintage MOTU puzzles on the way, so look for more soon! For now, enjoy a bonus image from that old coloring book, showing my childhood self's solution to not having enough non-white characters in MOTU!